New Quilt Project - Early Morning in the Tetons

I am working on a new quilt project for a competition which is coming up this summer. I'm going to try to put together something that I've been thinking about doing for a while - design a quilt to go with the writing I'm doing for my National Park Project.

Right now I'm working on an essay called "Beaver and Bear" about the day my husband ran across a bear and her two cubs in the Grand Tetons. The quilt will have bears on it - this picture is one I'm going to use for reference to do the cubs.
This is the photo I'm using to reference the mama.


Need to get going on this right away, since I'm within 4-5 weeks of needing it done. I'll post a photo of it when I'm done and include the essay too.

The Coccoon

It's been nearly five weeks since my knee replacement surgery and I've had a lot of time to just sit and think about things.

One of the things that I'm beginning to realize is, that I have been living in a cocoon of pain for several years now. With bad knees, which progressively got worse week after week, I found myself measuring every activity, every plan, every event in terms of how much pain it was going to cost me.

And the truth is, lately the answer has been - too much. I simply got to the point where there were things I couldn't do anymore - and those things included stuff I loved doing - shopping, going to museums, hiking in the National Parks, travel.

But lately, with my right knee getting better and better, I find that I'm starting to think like the old Denise. We are planning trips we want to take this summer and fall and no longer is my first thought about how I'm going to physically manage things. I can actually picture myself enjoying activities and not worrying about walking any distance.

I still have a ways to go before my right knee is up to snuff, then I have my left knee to take care of in June (although that one isn't in nearly the bad shape the right one is) - but I'm beginning to see some cracks in that cocoon and perhaps by this autumn - I can break free!

Emerging

I'm starting to emerge from the darkness of my first knee replacement surgery, which was 11 days ago.

The thing that surprises me about this is not the pain, which passed fairly quickly, but the feelings of weakness and fogginess that surround me. I have trouble being able to read - the words swim about the page - I have trouble doing hand sewing on my quilt projects - the needle seems to have a mind of its own. I haven't even touched my photo organizing project.

But worst of all, I haven't been able to do any writing. To get to a place where I can do anything creative, I have to be able to move into that space, and I guess the things that are going on with me right here, right now, are too compelling to enable me to put them to one side.

But it's only 11 days out - and every day seems fractionally better. The one thing I promised myself was that I wasn't going to try to hurry this healing. That I was going to take whatever time it was going to take, because it is a one-time thing I'm doing here. I need to take the time to do it well.

I just don't think I'm going to get as much progress done on my writing as I had hoped. But if all works out, I'll have the time and energy to do it soon.

Nolan at 2

I plan to write a poem each year on my grandson's birthday - here's this year's:


Nolan at 2

He greets us as we come in
with extravagant joy
"Yeah, Yeah," he says
as if he can't think of anything better
than us, coming through the door.

He has a big smile, sparkling eyes,
and a brand new haircut
- all his blond curls gone -
the hair carefully shaped to his head,
instantly aging him from baby to big boy.

We give him Batman, Superman and Spiderman,
small figures that just fit his hands,
and feed his new-found super hero passion.
He hops impatiently while his Dad
pulls them out of the packaging.
He doesn't want to open any other gifts.

We settle down with chocolate cake
and vanilla ice cream melting on the side,
while Batman and Superman fly among us
side-by-side, ever vigilant,
powered by 2-year-old magic.

A Good Start

Today I met up with my best friend, Carla, for lunch. I've known Carla since we first met in college 39 years ago this year. She is one of the very, very few people in my life who has known me when I was a teenager all the way up to now. We were college roommates and shared an apartment when we were in our twenties. We were the maid-of-honor in each other's weddings. She's one of my son's Godmother.

We've led parallel lives, getting married and having children all within the same few years. Even our weight tends to be the same and as we get older, we tend to have the same health problems.

We don't get to see as much of each other as we would like. Although we only live a few miles apart, we both have separate and busy lives. That's why it's so good to start out the new year with a good, long visit. Each time we meet up, it's like we are carrying on a conversation we were having the day before - or maybe even 40 years before.

She is blessed with several sisters, I am not. She's the closest thing I have to a sister sibling and these days, that means a lot. I know that she'll be there for me, even if we can't get together too often.

And I hope she knows that I'll be there for her too.

New Year Musings

Last year at this time, after a 2010 that was joyful, painful, hectic, happy, busy and overwhelming all at the same time, I asked for only a few things for 2011 - I wanted everyone to stay put for a while.

It worked! We had no weddings, births, funerals, job changes, moves or other dramatic events. The year was one that allowed me to take a breather, heal my bruises and make some decisions about the future.

We did do a lot of traveling - two trips out west (Wyoming and Utah) and several short weekend trips and a couple longer workshops.

This year will be different. This year I ask for time to heal. I'm having surgery on my knees the first part of the year, then I need to concentrate on getting my strength and stamina back.

To be able to do that, I have cleared the decks of obligations and volunteer work. I will concentrate on my health, my writing, my family and my friends. I will NOT run around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to be everything to everybody. The time for that is over. And to tell the truth, I never was that good at it anyway!

Quartet Christmas

Pepper, the sewing cat, helping me with my projects

We met at Sue's house for Quartet last week. We had dinner (salad and lasagne) and then sat around the fire in her stove fireplace and had cheesecake left over from an earlier event at the Box Factory.

In December we exchange simple gifts with each other and I decided to make decorative pillows with a photo image of the sign on the side of the Box Factory, which my husband, Tom, took several years ago for a poster. I made a pillow for myself too, and it's on my sofa in my writing studio.

I thought it was an especially fitting image, because we all met through our connections to the Box Factory and it means a lot to each of us, especially Ali since she's the executive director here now and logs a lot of hours in the joint.

It's a fun place to hang out, surrounded by other artists of all kinds, who are there to talk if you want, but will leave you alone if you need to concentrate. It's a place for creativity and expanding visions. And it's a pretty cool building too - 103 years and counting!

It's good to get out of the house to work and clear the cobwebs out of my brain - after all I can't stay at home sewing with kittys every day!