Family First

Sloan, heading off for her last year of college

I talked with my daughter, Sloan, yesterday and we discussed my feelings about her moving away. This wasn't new to her, but perhaps she didn't quite know how deeply I felt.

She told me that she would always keep in mind the idea of returning home and she wouldn't put herself in a situation where that simply wasn't an option.

That made me feel much better, but so did acknowledging to myself that I had the right to feel the way I do.

I talk to other women and it seems that everyone has some story about how their children moved away and they were just fine with it because, of course, they "only wanted them to be happy." They imply that I don't want that for her and, because my other two children live nearby, I should somehow be satisfied and stop whining about missing the third one.

Nope. Doesn't work that way with me.

There are many things I love and appreciate in this life, but my family is the only thing about which I am passionate.  I worked very hard; emotionally, financially and physically, to pull this little family of ours together and will continue to work at it until the day I die.  If I lost every other friend in this world, as long as I had my family, I would be just fine. They are the people I most want to spend time with. It is "us against the world."

So, I give myself permission to feel like this. I give myself permission to miss my daughter, dote on my grandchildren, prefer the company of my husband, and put all of them above and before anything else in my life.

Now, I feel happier.